How do I not have hate and fear?

Last night I went to bed with $28 to my name. This morning my bank charged me a fee and I have -$10. I don’t get paid until next Friday.

I make enough money to live comfortably within the expenses that I have.

I don’t gamble, drink, or smoke.

I have an ex wife who uses every little nuance of the law to cause me pain. Though we have joint custody and I have the kids more waking hours than she does, that one overnight a week allows her to take nearly $900.00 from me every month. After 2 trials to maintain the custody I have, I owe over $20,000.00 in legal and other debts.

This morning, I am trying not to panic. I am trying to drive out fear. I am trying to trust in Him though I’ve been crying for help for months seeing this day coming. I’ve cut costs. I’ve tried to save. I just can’t keep up, and things keep coming out of nowhere to bite me in the butt.

My car is out of gas… what is happening to me? How is this my life??

How do I pray? What do I pray? There is no repentance in her. She is so mean and vindictive and hateful and evil. All she wants is my destruction.

Please pray for me. Everything is so dark right now. So dark.


One comment

  1. Dear sir,
    I won’t pretend by saying I know exactly how you feel even though I have had such an experience of suffocating darkness all around me, some time in 2016. I can only tell you that GOD the FATHER of our LORD JESUS got me out and gave me fresh air.

    When I felt helpless and hopeless, I tried to watch the words of spoke out so as not to speak out of despair and I said to the LORD if I die I die and return to you because I was at my wit’s end. HE led me into reading and eating HIS WORD.

    Today, HE has taught me to trust that my head will not be buried in the dust because HE will always help me. In fact recently, I was sharing with my brother and another relative how GOD has been speaking to me to not be afraid. So I say to you sir DO NOT BE AFRAID for GOD is there with you.

    I have prayed for you and I believe that GOD will help you for HE is faithful.

    Remain strong and GOD bless.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s