Trying…

Father, I’m trying to be obedient…

to “wait upon” you.

to stand strong.

Give me the strength

to learn what I must.


I hurt today…

more than I have in a long time.

I’m tired… so tired.

I feel inept to this task,

and I don’t seem to be growing.


I should be more mature.

I shouldn’t want to escape

or hide in a hole.

Why is it so hard to do simple things,

like open my mail?


Why does every decision seem

to pit my heart against my wallet?

How long, oh Lord…

how long?

Come quickly.


I would have broken down and lost it by now,

unless I really believed

That I would see the goodness of the Lord

In the land of the living.

So, I wait…


Forgive my impatience.

Forgive my selfish heart.

You seek growth…

while I long for comfort.

Help me hold on.


I’m trying…

some days more than others.

My focus is all off.

It hasn’t even been a year…

and already I struggle.

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