I put our wedding pictures back up on the dresser today.
Interesting that you take them down when you stop by…
You feel that I’m unable to face reality… move on…
Your parents even encouraged me to do so.
It’s sad really; that God’s word means so little to so many.
I made some vows and I entered a covenant.
There was something in there about sickness and turns for the worse.
I meant those things, though I never pictured it quite like this.
I used to run scenarios in my mind… maybe I’m a bit strange.
I knew I wouldn’t leave if you lost your hair, face, limbs, or your ability for physical intimacy.
I was ready for tragic accidents…
I was ready for cancer of the body.
I never imagined cancer of the heart… the soul… the mind.
I never imagined the enemy would capture you.
Yet, it’s no different. I still stand by you.
I know you probably feel like I’m trying to trap you…
to keep you from “getting on with your life”.
You likely would think I’m mad if I told you.
He talks to me. The God of the universe speaks.
I’m standing, as long as He tells me to stand.
I know you don’t want to hear about “God and covenants”.
I know you could care less about my “feelings”.
Look, this has nothing to do with “feelings”.
I don’t feel like fighting this. It is exhausting.
I don’t feel like being lonely much of the time.
If you had gotten a terrible degenerative disease,
would you not expect me to stand by you and love you through it?
Here I stand.
If someone had kidnapped you, would you not expect me look for you?
Here I stand.
I know you don’t believe your heart will change.
You may not even think anything is wrong.
I believe in the God who stops the sun, raises the dead, and created you.
If He says He’s got this,
who am I to argue? You take it up with Him.